I’ll never forget waking up on my daughter’s first birthday, so excited to spend the day celebrating this little girl who had completed our family and stolen a piece of my heart. My husband and I took the day off and had an exciting adventure planned with her and her big sister. By the afternoon, however, I started to experience a sore throat. I powered through and made the most of this happy day. My sore throat felt worse that evening, and by the next morning, I was full-blown ill.
I had learned earlier in my career from some great mentors that you shouldn’t try to be a hero when you are sick. It’s better to stay home, get some rest and come back to work when you’re feeling better, which is easier said than done for someone like me. However, I heeded this advice. The next three weeks were filled with doctors’ appointments and medications, but nothing seemed to make me feel better. I was stuck. I couldn’t work, and I couldn’t take care of my children at home.
I needed help.
My husband had everything handled at the house, so my personal life was in order. But what about work?
Add to this the challenge of planning one of our largest multiday events of the year, with multiple speakers and hundreds of paid attendees, and I was ready to enter full-blown crisis mode. I’ve always viewed part of my role as being the glue that keeps everything together, as well as the air traffic controller ensuring that everyone is communicating. As the founding president of a nonprofit, I’m accustomed to being an integral piece of the puzzle and guiding my team.
While I wanted to be there, I also felt that I needed to be there. But I couldn’t be. I could barely lift my head from a pillow without my head spinning. Taking a line from the hit movie “Frozen,” I had to let it go. I had to trust my staff to bring everything together, from programs to speakers to sponsors to attendees, and do so seamlessly. And you know what? They did.
As leaders, you wear the weight of your organization on your shoulders. You often feel that if you aren’t in the meeting or on the conference call, that something is going to fall through the cracks.
You know that every member of your team is an integral piece, including yourself. However, it is important to take a step back and be confident in the team that you put together. They can and will rise to the task. It might not have been done exactly the way you would have done it, but that’s OK. As a perfectionist, it can be a hard lesson to learn that there is no one perfect way to accomplish a task — just a variety of excellent ways. And when you learn to let go, your staff will get a chance to show you how truly amazing they are.
Ashley Basile Oeken is president at Engage! Cleveland
